I still think about that afternoon I could have lost Kelsey. I wish I could get that fear out of my head.
When, for a few minutes, no adult knew where she was. And where was she? Standing out by the pick-up zone at school, with no one in sight. No one watching my child. No teachers, no office staff, no other children.
I could have been anyone, pulling up alongside a confused and alone 5 year old. I could have assured her that her mommy asked me to pick her up. She was confused enough; even though we’ve role played this very situation, she might have gone along.
I think about that day a lot. When, regardless of all the care and safety, all the precautions I’ve taken in the last 5.5 years, she could have been taken from me in those minutes of school neglect.
I can’t forgive the school or the teacher. Or myself. All I can do is place my trust more carefully.
When people ask why I choose to put my child in private school, I tell them. I would live on a diet of dried beans and drive a scooter to work if I had to, to put my child where she is now.